THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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