so explain again why im purple
no
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize