So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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