yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
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