Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
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