my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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