You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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