I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
