Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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