Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
