so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Randomize
