My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
