I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
