I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
