i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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