when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
