ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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