i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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