i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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