she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
