New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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