So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
