My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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