did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
