i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
