im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize