So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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