His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
my liver is dry heaving
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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