Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
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