Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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