you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
