The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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