On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Randomize
