So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
