White coat. Heels.
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
