She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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