then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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