He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
