my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out mid-signature
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize