Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Please don't give away my fajitas
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