My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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