lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.