I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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