You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
