well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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