Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize