we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
