You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
you win again, gameday.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
