I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
