He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
