The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
