so explain again why im purple
no
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
time to smoke my breakfast
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
