Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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