also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
